Finding the right au pair

Finding the right au pair


The economy is becoming harder by each passing day. Things are becoming more expensive as the economies keep downgrading. Nothing comes easy nowadays. This has made it very hard to hire labor. House help has become a hard thing to hire nowadays since people are not able to withstand paying for house help and also manage running the daily programs of the family. This is something that has greatly affected most homes within many countries across the world. Many homes are no longer hiring house helps because they just can’t afford them. So what is the solution to this great problem that’s affecting every nation across the world?

For those who wish to get house help in a much more fun way, an au pair is the best option for this. Those who have never heard of this word fail to understand how important such a person is. There are a lot of websites that have been set up on the internet to help people connect and find the right help for their homes at a much lower fee. You can consider an au pair to be of great help to you. They help you get the right help for your family at the lowest rates.

Imagine getting help from someone from far away! This is something that you can consider to be totally awesome. You will get to interact with them and learn their culture. It’s always good to learn new things since you never know when you will need to apply them. You might want to travel to the same country as that of your au pair in the future so you should consider hosting one for a period of time. It’s always fun and adventurers when you learn something new from a person from another country.

So where can you get a great au pair to host in your family? First of all you have to put a few things into consideration before getting any. You have to make sure that you have enough budgets to host an au pair in the first place. Do not rush into agreeing to get one and fail to meet their needs. But there is always a negotiation option available for you to work with. You can negotiate with the person you plan to host through hosting sites that are available on the internet and strike a deal about the fee you will be paying him/ her.


Can you imagine how easy and safe the world would be with the right help at an affordable fee available? There is nothing as easy as this. au pairs are not that hard to host since they are eager to experience new life outside their countries and this makes them offer the best services possible. This is something that can be of great help and very much affordable. Great help is always what we need and getting it is the hardest thing. This site is the best place you can get one for yourself.

What is a Special Needs Au Pair?

One of my kids has been diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome and ADHD. This means that we are, by DOS guidelines, a special needs host family. And that means we need a special needs au pair.

At AuPairCare, special needs au pairs have all had experience working with kids who have special needs and have expressed an interest in living with a family that has kids with special needs. Six years ago, when I first signed on as a host mom, it was this approach – special needs au pair who had both experience and interest – that set AuPair Care apart for me.

Does it mean that the au pair you find will have experience with the specific disability that affects your family? No. I have gotten lucky enough to find au pairs who grew up around somone on the spectrum or who worked with affected kids in camps or schools. But I’ve also hosted au pairs who’d never even met a kid on the spectrum until they met mine.

The thing is, any experience with kids who have special needs can set an au pair apart. Our au pairs have been blessed with a well of patience and understanding that’s often greater than my own. They understand the struggles faced every day by a kid who walks or talks or acts a little differently. They’re creative and supportive and willing to try new things. One of my au pairs wrote to her teachers back home for new ideas on how she could best work with my son. Another really got the dynamic of our family, where one kid has special needs and the others don’t, and she helped my kids understand each other and work better together.

I also make a point to ensure that our new au pairs always know what to expect. When you’re interviewing, be honest and open about what life is like in your family. How do your kids get along? Are there struggles, jealousies? What kind of additional help will your special needs child require? Any medications, treatments or routines? Is it noisy? Is it quiet? And I want to know what to expect of them. In interviews, I’ll give them scenarios to see how they will handle the rougher days. Kids with Asperger’s can tantrum out of frustration or exhaustion, I’ll say: if that happens over homework, what will you do? The answers to questions like that can tell you if the au pair has the skills and the temperament you need.

Are you a special needs host family? What are your tips to helping make the right match with a great special needs au pair?


Time to Say “Goodbye” to Your Au Pair


This month 2 delightful au pairs from my Orlando region completed their program year and headed back home to their native countries.  Hannah went home to New Zealand to start college as a teacher.  Laura returns to Germany after a travel adventure in the USA during her 30 day grace period.  These girls have new goals and challenges to tackle.  As their Area Director, I will miss them and wish them success.  I also know their host families will undergo a transition period as they adjust to the departure.

Prior to returning home, the girls received a Return Flight Request form by email a few months before their departure.  The au pair fills this form out and returns it to the SF office by the designated deadline.  Late forms are charged a $100. fee.  The au pair who completes her program can choose 3 potential departure dates for us to book her paid flight.  She can also decide to travel during the 30 day grace period given to au pairs who finish their program year and then fly home afterward.  Au pairs submit their Education Completion paperwork detailing their signed 60 hours of coursework (downloaded from Au Pair Room)  to their Area Director.  If the au pair successfully completed her required education she may be eligible for a bonus.  Not all au pairs receive a bonus.  It is based on the au pair contract they signed in their native country.  Au pairs who finsh all the program requirements receive a Certificate of Completion.

It can be emotional to say goodbye to your au pair.  I advise host families to help children understand in advance that at some point, their au pair needs to go home to her country and her family.  It helps if the children know up front to expect this departure.  Talk/share about the au pair’s plans once she gets home such as starting college or getting married so the kids can know what the au pair will be doing once she leaves.  It is a good idea to have the au pair and children and host parents as well, make a scrapbook or photo album to remember their time together.  Often my host families will have departure dinners with the au pair’s favorite American foods and special friends or family are invited.  Encourage the host children to keep in touch with the au pair after she leaves by providing email contact and pre-addressed stationary for the children to write their au pair.  Perhaps your au pair will visit you in the future or you will travel to see her in her country.  As a family take your au pair to see her off at the airport!

Help the children transition to the new aupairecare by creating a bond ahead of time.  The kids should be allowed to learn about the new au pair prior to arrival and get to communicate with her.  Talk about the differences in the 2 au pairs and how they might do things differently.  Sometimes host families will schedule an overalp between the outgoing au pair and the incoming au pair to help with training.  This can be positive or negative, depending on your situation.  It is unrealistic to expect the new au pair to immediately fill the shoes of the outgoing au pair.

A childhood rhyme comes to mind as I think about au pairs returning home and the new ones arriving bright eyed and eager to the host families to start their year, “Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other gold”.  After all, a departure means a new arrival and a new adventure in childcare and cultural exchange.

Au Pair/Host Family: Religion and Spirituality

An important consideration for many host families is an au pair’s religious or spiritual background.  Au Pair Care au pairs come from all walks of life.  We have au pairs who are Christian, Catholic, Muslim, Buddhist, Jewish, Agnostic, Atheist, and other religions as well.  On your au pair’s application, you can view their religious preference and also their level of practice such as “always”, “sometimes”, “never”.  During the interview process, ask the au pair about her religious or spiritual background.  She may want to go to worship with you and this will be valuable information for you both.  Other au pairs are not as interested in attending weekly worship but might be open to celebrating with the host family for holidays and special occasions.  Some au pairs have no religious or spiritual background.  They may or may not want to learn your beliefs and that is their choice.  I remember a Czech au pair who had never been exposed to religion in her home.  She was excited to attend worship with her host family for the first time ever.  I recall her delight when telling me about the friendly atmosphere and the physical beauty of the church.  She was particularly impressed with the stained glass windows!

I have had many au pairs who are not the same religion as their host family.  In these matches, both the au pair and host family need to be open minded to learning about the other’s beliefs.  For example, one of my local Christian families celebrated Ramadan with their Turkish au pair.  A Jewish host family added some Christmas traditions to their Hannukah celebration to include their Brazilian aupair’s practices.  One Catholic host mom and her Catholic au pair attended mass together, but at a Polish language church so the Polish au pair could better understand the service.  If a host family and au pair are different religions, there may be foods that are off limits or of special importance.  There may be holy days when your au pair can not work.  There may be holidays your au pair finds important to commemorate that you are not familiar with celebrating.  In all these above cases, the family and the au pair were able to be respectful about differences as well.

Your au pair may want to attend worship with you.  Or, if this is her day off, she might want to sleep in or spend time with friends.  A host family can request their au pair attend worship with them, but they can not require this unless it is part of the 45 hour work schedule and includes host family childcare duties.  One au pair of mine enjoyed spending her day off attending church with her host family and they would all go to lunch together afterwards.  This practice was discussed before they matched so that both the host family and au pair had the same level of commitment to attend together.  On some Sundays, the au pair did prefer to spend her day off alone, and my host family understood her needs.

In my experience, the religious/spiritual community is typically very warm and welcoming to interested au pairs.  This is a wonderful way for an au pair to meet new friends and gain a support system by joining a college group or a volunteer group.  I suggest host families research a few nearby places of worship prior to their au pair’s arrival.  This way you can be prepared to offer suggestions to your au pair.  Perhaps help your au pair reach out to a member of the church by calling ahead for the au pair.  Often, au pairs find the religious/spiritual community to be comforting and familiar, a positive reminder of home and their upbringing.

Talking Babies – Infant Sign Language and Infant Specialized Au pairs

The first time I encountered infant sign language was with my 10 month old niece.  We were sitting in the kitchen while her mom was feeding her some sweet yogurt.  The yogurt finished and she was not at all happy with this.  Simultaneously, she cried out and started making this strange sign with her hands.  “More?” my sister asked?  My niece smiled and kept making the signs as my sister popped open another yogurt.

Introduction to infant sign language is an important and fun educational tool for infant specialized au pairs to share with their host families.  At Aupair Care Academy, au pairs receive instruction on American Sign Language (ASL) basic principles and its application for infants from certified facilitators.  Many families are already using sign language with their infants as yet another way to connect and communicate with their young children.  So, they are excited to welcome an au pair with this knowledge and practice.

I had the opportunity to work with Lora Heller, Founding Director of Baby Fingers™LLC for my introduction to infant sign certification.  According to her and other expert research, a few of the advantages of infant sign language are:

-Increased comprehension

-Decreased frustration

-Increased self-esteem and confidence

-Motivates infants to speak

An article, “Why Teach Sign Language?” on Parents.com also stated “Parents are beginning to realize that children’s proficiency in using their hands comes well before using the more intricate muscles of their tongue and vocal cords. And both parents and experts agree that signing with your baby can relieve his frustration at not being able to communicate with you (and your frustration at not being able to understand him).”

Your infant specialized au pair will be eager to share what she has learned with your baby.  Talk with her and create a plan for using these tools with you and your baby.

Multiples and the Au Pair: Host Mom Lani’s Story

As Area Director of Central Florida, I have a cluster of Host Families where about 30% of the families are parents of multiples, both twins and triplets and some families even have additional children!  Recently, at our local Au Pair Care Host Family Event, I got to witness first hand a mom of multiples and her au pair in action!  Host Mom, Lani, is a busy first time Host Mom with almost 3 year old adorable triplets, 2 boys and a girl.  We were at a playground and the triplets were running, climbing, eating, laughing and going in all different directions!  I spoke with the Host Mom about her experience having an aupair.

Here is some of Lani’s personal Au Pair Care story shared below:

Lani says, If you are a parent of multiples, you probably have a little more difficulty in finding suitable childcare than most. And if you are a parent of triplets or more.. well, it’s even harder. I stayed home with my triplets for their first 2 years, and loved every (ok, not every) minute of it. After the kids were born, I couldn’t have imagined having the kids in daycare, and even if it was an affordable option for us (which it is not), I envisioned spending countless days in the pediatrician’s office while I missed work. A nanny would cost $15 to $20 an hour, which would also make it not worth the expense. And another prohibitive factor: my husband and I both work irregular hours/schedules that would make it hard to find a childcare provider who could accommodate us.

After two years of staying at home, our bills were piling up, and I was starting to itch to return to work. The opportunity arose, and I knew I had to find affordable childcare that would allow me to take it.

Lani and her husband contacted Au Pair Care and matched with a 26 year old au pair, from Thailand, Ploy. 

Lani says, It is like we have a new member of our family, and I am very happy with our choice. I was very nervous (as I’m sure she was as well) about having someone we didn’t know just come and live in our home with us, but as time goes on, it is getting more and more comfortable. She is great with our kids; calm, patient, and kind. In our home we have a very chaotic vibe; always rushing and anxious, and her calm presence sort of balances us out. My husband and I can now go out once a week- something we haven’t been able to do since before our kids were born. I am able to go to the gym a few times a week, and even keep up my blog! I also love that I do not have to get up early to get my kids ready to go to daycare, and rush to pick them up at a certain time. I try to schedule our au pair to work a little longer than my workday, so in case I run late, there’s no need to rush.

AuPairCare’s infant Specialized Care Program

My husband and I went out on a date night the other night – to see Coldplay at the Hollywood Bowl!  Alas not having any family on the same continent,  or even a list of childcare back-ups  (we don’t get out much!),  we needed to locate a babysitter ASAP. As I imagine being the case with all new parents, our requirement was not only a good babysitter, but also someone who had solid experience with the peculiar breed that is babies!

This got me to thinking about how cool it is that AuPairCare has addressed this particular parenting concern and I believe are the only au pair agency to do so. The Infant Specialized Care Program dictates than at an au pair must have at least 200 documented hours working with children under two years of age, also these au pairs have expressed an interest in caring for infants. Infant Specialized designated au pairs complete a week long training designed by childcare specialists at AuPairCare’s Training Academy in New York. The classroom is set up as a nursery and each au pair is given a baby (doll obviously!)  to care for during the week.  Au pairs are given training in the following areas of baby care in the “American Way” (especially cool, I think, is the training in infant massage, baby sign language and the American heart Association certification in Infant First Aid and CPR):

General household safety and hygiene
Communicating with parents about infant care (including the use of a Daily Diary)
Infant care basics (feeding, bathing, changing, transportation)
What to do in an emergency
Creating and monitoring baby’s daily routine
Infant stages of development
Games and activities to stimulate infant mental development
Caring for multiples
American parenting techniques
Coping techniques to handle stress as an infant caregiver
Baby massage and infant soothing techniques
Infant sign language
Certification in Infant First Aid and CPR
People often ask me why I don’t have an au pair?  And if I did, what would I like most about having one? I don’t have an au pair because like a lot of people in LA I have a small house without an extra bedroom  (we are already stuffed to the gills as it is, with an office on the dining room table!). However,  if I did have room,  ah how I would love it!  It would be so great to be able to go out for date nights more than once per year!  Also, it would be great not having to scramble for a babysitter who can not only corral my 9 yr. old, but also competently handle baby’s routine. I wonder… perhaps I could oust my son to a tent in the back yard…?!

We at Au Pair Care love

Inspired by our international team at Au Paire Care, we asked around the office to compile a special, nostalgic, yet up-to-date list of our favorite children’s books – books  that we would love to have our au pairs read to our kids.
   
1.    The Story of the Little Mole Who Knew It Was None of His Business

This is a loveable oh-so-funny story about a mole that wants to find out who happened to poo on his head.  So he goes out and asks the rabbit, the bear and many other animals on his way. It’s a lovely illustrated book and a fun story that will keep your kid excited, and will make you laugh for its underlying wisdom.

2.    The Trip To Panama
The colorful and detailed pictures and the exciting story tell a tale about friendship, dreams, appreciation, and home. Everything starts with the little bear discovering a little box while he is fishing at the river. On the box it says “Panama” and it smells like bananas. Immediately the little bear knows this is the land of his dreams. So he runs home to the small tiger to prepare for a long journey to Panama.

3.    Friends
This absolutely charming and delightfully illustrated tale for all ages will make you and your child laugh out loud and learn about friendship through the adventures of Charlie Rooster, Johnny Mouse, and Percy Pig. They ride their bikes together, play games together and sleep together- even if that means Percy the pig has to sleep on a Rooster stick. It is one of the most read books in Germany.

4.   The Very Hungry Caterpillar

More than 12 million copies of this book have been sold around the world.  Kids are excited to follow the path of the caterpillar while he eats his way through one apple on Monday, two pears on Tuesday, and so on.  The book teaches counting and the days of the week with bright, bold pictures and a butterfly metamorphosis story!

5.    Happy Hippo, Angry Duck: A Book of Moods (Ages 2-6)

Sandra Boynton is a popular American humorist, songwriter, children’s author, and illustrator. This, her newest book on the market, describes moods and emotions with very funny pictures. Kids love to repeat the sounds and feelings that are described in the book and the pages are colorful and vivid!

6.    Farmyard Beat
This is a colorful bedtime story, perfect for toddler and preschoolers, to read aloud, repeating the rhymes and sounds. All the animals on the farm can’t sleep, and before you know it there is a party going on.

7.    One Duck Stuck

Another great counting and animal book with bright and bold illustrations. Why is it special? This book received the Parents Book of the Year award and the Oppenheim Toy Portfolio Gold award.

8.    When I Grow Up I Want to Be Me

Oprah calls this one of the most captivating children’s books she’s ever read. We guess it must be good!

9.    Pippi Longstocking

Astrid Lindgren, from Sweden, was famous for her books in America years ago. The target age for these stories is four to six, and quick-to-read children will be able to handle them at seven. Pippi is incredibly strong and can lift a horse on her own. She is also not afraid of anything, so she lives alone in Villa Villekulla with her horse and a monkey, Mr. Nilsson. With her friends, Tommy and Annika, she experiences many adventures, like taking on two burglars, having an unusual birthday party, and rolling down a hill in a wine barrel.

The Right Start: Au Pair Tips for Your First Few Days

After my recent post on  Au Pair care Academy, au pair Sunday asked for tips on getting through those first days with your new host family.  It really can be a huge adjustment.  Here are some tips from au pairs I spoke to, but I’d love to hear more from au pairs!

KEEP AN OPEN MIND: Everything will be different.  Trust me, everything!  Ask questions whenever you need to and embrace the differences.  Treat everything as a learning experience.

HELP OUT: Even though you are not working yet, set the tone for the year by taking care of your dishes, offering to assist your host parents and being a contributing member of household.  Show some initiative with tasks that they give you and make it clear that you want to be there to help.  On the other hand, though….

SET LIMITS: Don’t go too far overboard to please your host family if they ask you to do something that is outside the program rules. 

SPEND QUALITY TIME: Get to know your host family, especially the kids you’ll be caring for.  Work hard on making a connection with each family member and try to spend some one on one time playing or talking with them.

 DISCONNECT: After you have let your family and friends know you have arrived safely, turn off skype and log off of Facebook.  Immerse yourself in your host family and American culture.  Of course you’ll use these tools throughout the year to keep in touch, but treat those first few days as an opportunity to nourish the new relationship with your host family.

BE PATIENT: Give yourself (and your host family) some time to adjust.  Your English may be rusty, or maybe you and one of your host children did not connect right away.  Remember that these things take time.  Give it your all and more than likely, it will set you on the path to a great year together.


Take some time before your au pair arrives to develop a list of some things that you would like your au pair to do that she might not think of herself. Every culture and person is different, so the more information you give your au pair, the less room there is for frustration and misunderstandings. It may also be helpful once she arrives to ask her which tasks she views as part of her job. The answers may be right on, or you may find that there are some things that need to be discussed to clear up confusion. Some au pairs need more direction than others, so don’t be afraid to be too specific about your expectations. It can’t be said too many times that setting clear and direct expectations from the beginning (read: interview process) is the besy way to ensure that your match is successful. When issues like these comes up, I encourage host families to examine the expectation to make sure it is reasonable and if the expectation was clear to the au pair.



Tags: au pair, child care,
Lovely Ladies

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